https://bit.ly/3s1VQes
https://bit.ly/3MIM36M
https://bit.ly/3eInRVp
https://bit.ly/3ySTlin
https://bit.ly/3s1VZi0
https://bit.ly/3Sbd7fN
https://bit.ly/3s1W1GE
https://bit.ly/3S8K6Bt

To me, it’s analogous to someone who has a *fantastic* job (great marriage) but has their degree from some no-name school (supposedly low SMV) being continually envious of someone who went to an Ivy (supposedly high SMV) who may be unemployed in a tough job market (i.e. dating).

This is just my perception– I could be totally off the mark! This is how I read most of your posts, though: Someone with a great life who still may have a wounded soul.

PS: This marriage thread has been really, really great. Heaps of kudos! :mrgreen:

131Sai February 18, 2013 at 2:14 pm
“the world is out to get us, and we’ve suffered enough – time to make bitches pay”
As long as it’s just Marcotte, Dworkin, etc. and not the folks here, I accept someone must pay.

I honestly give a crap, it’s just that I had nothing valid to type (except I feel bad about Mrs. Robber :( ) until I thought of something a few minutes ago:
Everyone is human (I assume) and therefore imperfect, so how do you fight properly, if such a way exists, and then seek reconciliation?

132David in Dallas February 18, 2013 at 2:28 pm
Sternhammer: ” Playboy wouldn’t want to publish their portrait anymore, but when I look at her getting dressed I still see them in all their youthful splendor.”

This struck a chord with me.

I’m not sure how universal this is, but a similar experience is true for me. With a little smile and a flash of some skin, I can see my wife sexually as she was over 10 years ago when we met. It’s like there’s a younger imprint of her inside me that can be accessed at different times. She and I may age, but the imprint doesn’t (at least I haven’t noticed). There will always be a part of her that I see as that younger version of herself.

I used to think this is might be peculiar to me, my wife, or marriage. However, reflection suggests that it is not. I’m constantly having to “re-adjust” my view of our daughters because there’s always a part of me that sees them as the younger version of themselves. I’ve also seen something similar occuring at work.

I think, younger women need to consider that, if they seek to “wait to get serious,” they may be failing to consider that, if you marry younger, then you may not be on the same “depreciation schedule” (to borrow the term) with your husband as you might be with others (i.e., the sexual marketplace). Likewise, younger men need to consider that, if you attach at a younger age to a woman, there will be part of the younger spouse that remains with you. As such, while we are all concerned with the declines that age forces upon us, if you marry younger, you may be able to capture some of your idealized youth inside your partner’s view of you.

Unfortunately, reading over this, it sounds like hippy BS.